Ladies Man
by Weezle13
Summary: He’s not such the ladies man that he thought he was. Complete
1. Chapter 1

**Hello. Ok I know I'm supposed to be doing Invisible Man however this just came to me and wouldn't leave me alone till I had written it. So now that its written I can go back to my first fic. I hope lol.**

**No I don't own them. I have no money to even try and buy them. Damn !!!!**

**Ladies Man.**

**Summery- He's not such the ladies man that he thought he was.**

"Severus maybe I could give you hints on your love life. You look hideous like that, you look like an overgrown bat. I mean if I did the right work on you I'm sure you could be almost as irresistible as me. Why I have beautiful women just throwing themselves at my feet." cried Gilderoy Lockhart as he walked into the staff room following an irate Severus Snape. "Who could resist this handsome face."

It was time, yet again, for the monthly teachers meeting and judging by the current mood of the most recent DADA teacher it was going to be a long one. Lockhart was going on about how brilliant, smart and handsome he was, and that could only mean one thing. He was going to hit on another female member of staff. All of whom had just buried themselves into whatever they were doing before the two men walked in.

"Xiomara Hooch you look absolutely fabulous today as always."

The blonde haired, hawk eyed witch looked up from her quidditch magazine and glared at the 'handsome' obscenely smiling man who had just sat next to her and put his arm around her. "Oh Lockhart" She gushed in a falsely high voice "just watch me resist your charms" She dropped the act when she realised that he was too thick and too stuck up his own arse too realise that she was taking the piss "besides I don't think that my husband would like you with your arm around me like that."

"Your married. Gosh. Who's the lucky fellow that caught your eye. A big, burly and famous quidditch player no doubt."

Xio rolled her eyes "No. My husband is that 'overgrown bat' that you walked in with." The flying instructor gave an evil grin and continued in a suspiciously innocent tone "but you were right he is big, very _big_" and with that returned to her reading as quite a few of the teachers snorted at the horrified look on the DADA teachers face.

"Oh." Lockhart shook his head and moved on to his next victim "Sal." he said smoothly turning this time to the astronomy teacher "You are…." but the tall dark haired, dark skinned woman cut him off she held up her left hand and said a few unintelligible words and a ring appeared on her ring finger. "Sorry I'm married. And what a man" her black eyes grew misty "none could measure up to him in my eyes." She gave him a sly wink and she too when back to what she was doing. This time it was studying star charts.

"Poppy" Lockhart tried again

"Married to Alastor Moody" replied the plump stocky mediwitch. Lockhart's eye's widened as he thought _anyone_ who would want to marry that ugly scarred _freak _of an Auror _"Mad Eye Moody!"_

"Yeah I married him when I was 27. I first met him when I was training at St Mungo's and he had been injured by one of Grindelwald's followers. "

"Is there anyone who isn't married here."

Severus gave a mischievous grin "Yeah. Pomona and Minerva."

Lockhart eagerly turned to Pomona Sprout but was disappointed to see her shake her head. "Sorry but your not my type darling"

"Eh. What is your type then? How can I not be it. I'm perfect. Every girls dream."

"Well darling I'm not every girl and your not my dream. More like Poppy or Xio or Minerva or well you get the idea." the witch grinned and returned to potting her rare A_asmic Rosa, _a blue and very beautiful rose.

Lockhart looked horrified "Is there any normal witches here."

"Define normal" came an amused voice from the doorway. Everyone spun round to see the headmaster Albus Dumbledore stood there flanked, as always, with Minerva McGonagall by his right side.

"One who finds me attractive just like every other woman in the magical world" shot the golden haired man.

"I take your annoyed response to your previous conversation that its a negative response Professor." was Albus' answer to the question "Now if we could please get on with the meeting.

The meeting started with the usual boring useless junk that it always did and Lockhart was amused to find that with all the shuffling, for some reason, earlier when he entered the room (unbeknown to him that it was to try and put as much distance between the staff and himself) Lockhart found himself sat in between Filius Flitwick and the only woman in Hogwarts not yet to have turned him down. Minerva McGonagall.

And what a woman. Yes so she was older then him but she didn't look it. She was beautiful with not a gray hair showing in her raven hair, and clear green eyes. Well with his irresistible charms and ways he was sure that he could hook her and reel her in. and when he had her Lockhart was sure that he could change her so that she wore better robes that hugged her figure more and get her to let her hair down. Lockhart was sure that he could make her perfect, just not too perfect, wouldn't want to take too much attention away from him.

Lockhart studied Minerva through the meeting. An action that was not lost on the staff that were present during his earlier attempts at wooing the female staff. What Lockhart didn't seem to know was that if he went for Minerva then he would face the wrath of Albus Dumbledore who had been in love with Minerva since forever and Minerva felt the same but they were too chicken too tell the other. When the meeting ended they started to put bets on who would catch on first Albus or Minerva, who would lose their temper because of it first Albus or Minerva (the bets and most definite favourite runner was Minerva with her Scottish temper though Filius did bet for Albus, much to the amusement of everyone else) and the final bet was for what they would do. This ranged from sacking him, to spells jinxes and curses, to a very scary Minerva and Lockhart getting together (Sibyl's inner eye told her that this was going to happen and when had her inner eye ever been wrong.).

It was going to be fun to see the action.

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While the other staff made bets Lockhart rushed to Minerva side and bowed graciously.

"Minerva please allow me to escort you to your rooms. A lady such as yourself should not be forced to go anywhere alone."

Minerva turned from the conversation she was having with Albus to glare at the younger man. "Lockhart I have no wish to be escorted anywhere I am not a prisoner in my own home. Thank you very much." and with that Minerva turned back to Albus to return to the previous conversation about Fudge (as in the bumbling idiot not the sweet though if Minerva had permitted it Albus would have talked about the sweet all day).

Lockhart looked putout for a moment before trying again. "Minerva, really I'm just thinking of you. You should not be alone…."

"I am not alone. Now if you will excuse me"

"Really Minerva I could…." however what he could do was cut off by a sharp retort by Minerva who looked beyond annoyed.

"Professor I am in the middle of a conversation so if you don't mind I would like to get back to it. Thank you." and with that she yet again she turned back to Albus. For a moment Lockhart looked put out. The rest of the staff were finding it hard to not laugh out loud at the scene playing out before them. Suddenly Lockhart brightened.

"Uh oh I think he's going to say something stupid" smirked Severus to his wife. Who had stuffed her fist into her mouth to stop herself from laughing out loud.

"Minerva. My Darling. I am going to make all your dreams come true." Minerva turned and raised one eyebrow at the man.

"What could you possible know about my dreams?"

"They include me" the staff nearly choked collectively at that remark Minerva's eyes narrowed while Albus' widened.

"Damn both figured it out at the same time it's a draw" Xio muttered "That means that the money rolls over to the next bet. Come on Min lose your temper and do something."

"Minerva would you join me for dinner in my rooms. Just you and me. Alone. Together. All night." Lockhart grinned his most 'charming' grin.

"No" said Minerva mater-of-factly and turned to Albus "if you could excuse me I have marking to do however how about a game of chess tonight night?"

"I would love to." with that Minerva turned on her heel and walked out of the room followed shortly by Albus as he went to his office and then finally Lockhart left as well. As the staff room door shut behind him Lockhart was sure he hear laughter.

**Well there's chapter 1. I hope you liked it. don't worry the updates for this story wont be that long in between as it is all ready written.**

**Please read and review.**

**Thank you.**

**Weezle**


	2. Chapter 2

Hello sorry for the wait but here is the second chapter as promised.

I know I'm supposed to update Invisible Man but my brain just wont work and after a 48+ hour week three times in a row I just cant stay awake long enough to write anything so I'm giving you an already written chapter.

Please enjoy.

The story is mine the characters aren't. Sorry.

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**Chapter 2.**

Breakfast the next day almost caused both Minerva and Albus to lose their tempers. Lockhart had somehow arranged the staff seating so that he was sat next to Minerva. The soul reason that Minerva could see for him doing that was to regale her with stories of his bullshit fantasies, oh sorry, his '_adventures'. _Minerva rolled her eyes as Lockhart once again told her how he defeated something using some muggle artifact that Minerva wasn't listening enough to take notice of.

Slowly her attention panned around the hall to take in the children who were all talking and laughing loudly and the rest of the staff who seemed to find something amusing, though Merlin knows what, to finally rest on the near silent man who was sat at her other side as always.

"Albus are you alright? You seem very quite"

Albus started and looked up from his untouched food to briefly glance at Lockhart (who hadn't noticed that Minerva had stopped listening and was still talking) then finally settled on his deputy. "I'm fine I just have a lot on. That's all."

"Well if you ever need any help I'm always here you know that. Don't let it get to you. If you want I could arrange for the Minister to mysteriously disappear" Minerva smirked slightly. Albus chuckled softly "but then I would have some other _coughmoroncough_ asking me dumb questions."

"No. Then you could be that dumb moron. That way if you have questions just ask yourself"

"And you would be made Head of Hogwarts"

"I'm willing to make that sacrifice for you. As long as your happy I'm willing to put up with the Ministers dumb questions"

"But the Minister would be me" Albus' eyes were now up too full twinkle, Minerva noticed with pride. She had managed to cheer him up.

"Like I said dumb questions. 'Which socks should I ware today?' Or maybe 'should I really buy those bright orange robes?'. A question which I said no to and you still bought them by the way."

Albus chuckled "I like those robes"

"You have _no_ taste"

It was at that moment that the mood was broken as a familiarly annoying voice pierced the air. "Minerva. Darling are you listening to me?" Minerva slowly turned to Lockhart and said in her dry teachers voice "No. I'm afraid I was unaware of you speaking to me. I thought that you were talking to your narcissistic friend." her last word was muttered quietly as she walked out of the hall however Xio Hooch just caught it and burst out laughing. "Yourself"

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Albus slowly walked towards Minerva's office door during her free period. Knocking on the door Albus entered his best friends office and came to a stand still. There were literally thousands of red roses filling the small room. Every so often there was a picture of Lockhart smiling at him, smugly. Albus looked at Minerva who looked annoyed at something "Yes" she snapped "what can I do for you?" I was wondering if you were ok I was worried about your sudden departure at breakfast"

"I'm fine I just had homework to mark. Always marking. The children don't seem to understand that the more homework I set them the more I set myself." with a sigh she lowered her head back to the appalling essay in front of her.

"Well if you ever need any help I'm always here you know that. Don't let it get to you." Minerva grinned at Albus' words that mirrored hers early that day. "Thank you I appreciate it."

"As do I Tabby." with that he edged for the door "I should let you get on with the marking" Minerva nodded. Albus turned and ran straight into Lockhart as he walked purposefully into the room.

"Professor Dumbledore, what a surprise."

"Professor Lockhart what are you doing here don't you have 2nd years to teach?"

"I do. I do indeed. However I wanted to see my darling Minerva before I try and teach those rabble anything more" Albus' eyebrows shot up but Lockhart didn't even notice. "If you could excuse us. Minnie. Darling how do you like the roses?" Albus felt himself being pushed out of the office and turned around to storm off completely missing Minerva's half angry half depressed look.

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Minerva was ready to kill Lockhart by lunch time. Even when she was teaching he had come to her and interrupted the class with his attempts to persuade her to date him. She even thought about eating lunch in her office to keep away from him but that would just send him up to her and she really didn't want to be on her own with him.

"_Why"_ she thought as she walked down to the great hall _"Why me? Why did he chose me anyway? I'm not beautiful or anything like that. My only redeeming factor is my ability to teach and he's not the type to take any notice of that. Self absorbed twerp! Why the hell do people think that he's so great. I prefer understated like a certain Head of Hogwarts. No stop it Minerva. He doesn't care if he did he would stop Lockhart's harassment."_

With that depressing thought Minerva sat in her seat at the staff table and glanced out at the smiling faces that surrounded her. Looking at Albus she noticed that he refused to look at her and instead stared intently at the food on his plate.

"Minerva. My Darling. There you are. I've missed you. Oh….." Lockhart trailed away when he saw that Xio had sat next to her best friend while she was looking at Albus.

"I thought you could do with a break Tabby" the flying instructor whispered to her.

"Thank you. I would kiss you if Severus wouldn't get jealous." Minerva grinned.

Lockhart took the free seat next to Xio and leaned around her to look at Minerva. "Did you miss me as much as I missed you?"

Hooch noticed how Albus winced at that comment and then throw himself into the conversation with Filius on his other side to block out Lockhart.

Minerva just glared at him then muttered to Xiomara "how can I miss him when he wont go away." Xio just snorted and started a conversation about the quidditch teams for this year, and how Slytherin had better win "Severus just isn't himself when they lose, he's in a bad mood for weeks and doesn't want to have _any_ fun."

"You know Xio. There are such things as too much information."

At that Lockhart once again tried to turn the conversation back to him. "You know I used to be an excellent quidditch player. I was head hunted to play for the Wakefield Werewolves but I turned them down to help those less fortunate them myself. I have helped countless villages from….."

"Professor really. I am a firm believer that all good deeds would speak for themselves and don't need to be boasted about." Snapped Minerva as Xio laughed and glanced at Albus who hadn't taken any notice of the conversation. _"You're a stubborn prat sometimes Albus" _With that the talk returned to quidditch without anymore of the annoying interruptions.

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Well that is it what did you think? Did you like it? Tell me. Not like? Tell me. Did read it? Tell me. I don't care I just want the reviews.

Thank you for reading

Weezle


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello here is the third installment of Ladies man. I am sorry about the wait.**

**Chapter 3**

Lunch was finally over and Albus retreated to his office feeling more angry then he had ever felt before. He slammed the door shut behind him causing Fawkes to jump slightly and croon softly. Albus rounded on the poor innocent bird and snapped "I cant believe him. Lockhart. That fool. He things that he is so wonderful and Merlin's gift to woman. He thinks that he can swan in here and take _My Minerva_ from me. WELL HE CANT!"  
Suddenly all the fight and anger left him as he stared out of the large windows. "But he can Minerva was never mine. I was too much of a coward to do anything about my feelings for her and now I have lost her. Why would she want me anyway when she can have a young, handsome man like Lockhart." with that he sank into his chair behind his desk and buried his face in his hands. Upon the walls the pictures all exchanged looks and rolled their eyes as one of the earlier faces disappeared to find Xiomara and tell her that Albus had lost his temper and to give Filius his winnings.MMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMinerva knocked quietly on Albus' office door and entered to find Albus hunched over and staring moodily into the fire.  
"Albus." no response "Albus" still Albus stared into the fire oblivious to his friend and secret love stood behind him. Well he was until she stood in front of him and flicked him lightly on his long crooked nose. "Albus Dumbledore. Wake up." Albus started and glared at the witch "what do you want?" he snapped in a tone Minerva had never heard before.  
"I thought we had a chess game tonight"  
"I'm not in the mood." Albus refused to meet Minerva's eyes and continued to try and burn the sight of the fire in his mind.  
"Albus what is the matter. Have I done something to upset you? What is wrong?"  
Albus was too wrapped up in self-pity to hear the anguish in Minerva's voice. Instead his temper snapped and this time he took it out on Minerva. "There is nothing wrong. I'm fine. Will you just leave me alone and stop harassing me. I don't want to talk." he turned towards his windows to look at the grounds as the moon rose ignoring the distraught woman behind him.  
"Very…very well then. Whatever you wish. Goodnight Headmaster." with that Minerva practically ran from the room trying to hold back her tears until she could get to her private rooms.  
The pictures of the old heads all looked shocked and dismayed as they looked at the once great and loving wizard as he wiped his eyes and walked into his chambers.  
The pictures all shared dismayed glances "How the hell are they going to patch that one up?" asked Rowanda Moric  
"I have no idea." sighed Armando "I wish that he would just throw her on the desk and have his way with her." several of the other pictures nodded their agreement "besides we need some action round here and I haven't seen _anything _interesting since I died." The pictures burst out laughing at that while Rowanda just said "Really Armando try and control yourself. Please." but the small smirk on her face told him that she was as amused as the others.  
"Oh you know you love me Row" laughed Armando as he walked out to tell Xiomara that her best friend might need a shoulder to cry on.

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Xiomara sighed as she walked to the staff table and felt the icy tension between the Headmaster and the Deputy. Sitting next to her husband she wished that she could curl back into his arms to keep the frostiness away.  
"They have been like this for over a week. _10 days for Merlin's sake_. I don't think I cant take much more of this. Can't I just hit their heads together and see if they develop a brain cell between them."  
"Now Xio that would not be helpful." Severus replied "funny but not helpful."  
"Well I can't just let them go on like this. They are slowly killing themselves. This is not the way to be healthy. Hay that's a point maybe we can get Poppy to say that this argument is causing an illness and they should make up."  
"They maybe thick-headed Gryffindors but I don't think they are that thick."  
"I guess so."MMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADIn the center of the table the atmosphere was near subzero. Even the pumpkin juice was starting to freeze. Not a word was said between the two top authorities of the school. "Minerva. My Darling." came the sickly sweet call of the DADA teacher as he came bounding into the room and to the staff table. Still without saying a word Minerva got up to leave.  
"Minerva where are you going?"  
"I have marking to do."  
"Minerva you work too hard" Minerva didn't answer just left the room without a backward glance.  
The others noted as Albus' shoulders slumped. The week of not talking to Minerva weighed heavily on the great man. He didn't realise exactly how much he had come to rely on her for support and friendship. Despite what he promised himself, when he realised that though he could never love another he would never let his feelings get in the way of her happiness, and he had just done that. Minerva could be happy with Lockhart and he was falling out with her for it. Without her even knowing why he had been the way he had. He was no friend. He would never deserve her. Minerva truly was the goddess she was named after.  
When Albus finally came out of his musings he was startled to find that most of the hall was empty and that the only occupants of the staff table apart from himself was Xiomara Hooch and Severus Snape. Both of whom looked at him with a coldness that rivaled that between himself and Minerva at the moment.  
"What?"  
Xio glared at him. "Are you going to drag your head out of your arse yet and apologise to Minerva?" Albus just blinked at his flying instructor. "Don't even attempt to play dumb. Last week was one of the three times Minerva McGonagall has ever cried on my shoulder since we met when we were first years."  
Albus winced at that knowing how proud his best friend was and how much he must have hurt her to get her into that state. "If you would excuse me."MMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADA soft knock broke Minerva's concentration on her 6th year mock tests that she was marking. _"Well it cant be that prat Lockhart"_ she thought _"he just walks in and pisses me off. The other staff all have classes. Maybe it's Albus come to tell me he's sorry and then sweep me of my feet to snog me senseless. Not likely but hay I can daydream."  
_"Come in" she called looking down at her desk briefly to put down her quill. When she looked up she couldn't help the way her eyes widened slightly in shock at Albus stood there looking like a nervous first year.  
"Albus. What can I do for you?" her voice, she was pleased to hear, held none of the emotion that was raging below her calm surface.  
"Minerva. I…..well…..I wanted to apologise for how I reacted last week. I was under some stress but that was no excuse to take it out on you and I should have come here sooner rather then let it get like this and fester. I really am sorry for what I put you through and I was wondering if you would give this foolish old man another chance?"  
Minerva looked at Albus and noted the sincerity in his eye's. Those beautiful blue eye's that were the window to his soul and currently studying the floor with extreme interest. His face showed his age for the first time that Minerva had known him. There were bags under his eyes and he had seemingly lost some weight.  
"Albus you know I will always be there for you. You're my best friend. Of course I forgive you." Albus' head shot up to look Minerva in the eye. "No matter what happens I will always stand by you Albus just as you always did for me. If you ever feel under stress again talk to me maybe I can help."  
Albus grinned boyishly that made the years fall off his face again.  
"Besides" carried on Minerva "you cant be the greatest, most wonderful, handsomest _'Super God'_ all the time can you?"  
"Do you have to keep bringing up that blasted Daily Prophet article?" Albus asked good naturedly glad that Minerva had forgiven him so readily and was not only willing to put it behind her but also to understand. To a degree. "It has been nearly 55 years since it was published."  
"Aww come on its soooooo much fun watching you squirm"  
"Ok I suppose I deserve it.  
"Exactly." it was then that the bell rang for the next class.  
"How about I let you beat me at chess as an apology. Say tonight my office?"  
"Albus I don't need you to let me win I seem to have no problem when you are trying. However I would love to beat you at a game of chess."  
"Yes yes rub it in why don't you. One day I will win again."  
"I doubt that"  
"You do wonders for a mans ego you know that don't you?" Minerva just smiled sweetly that did nothing to hide the mischievous glint in her eye. "Well everybody else are all praising you I would hate to be the same then I would get boring."  
Albus chuckled "We wouldn't want that. Now I must go before you destroy my ego completely and your students get too out of hand. I believe you have the Weasley Twins next."  
Minerva winced slightly. "I will see you later then Albus." Albus nodded and left Minerva to the unenviable task of teaching the twins. 

**Well that is that. The next chapter is coming up this time next week I promise. Just as invisible man will. Please read and review, suggestions and constructive criticism is welcome flames will be flamed back. **

**Weezle13**


	4. Chapter 4

**The end is here. I hope you enjoy it. **

**Weezle**

* * *

**Chapter 4**

Though things between Albus and herself were finally back to normal Minerva still had one major problem that was giving her a serious headache.

_Gilderoy __**Bloody**__ Lockhart!  
_

He was still trying to get her to go out with him. Something that Minerva regarded as on the same level as sticking red hot pokers in her eyes or maybe pulling out her own teeth with, as the muggles put it, rusty pliers.  
Fortunately she had been able to keep her temper. But only just.  
That hold on her temper snapped on the day of a Hogsmead trip out for the older students.  
Albus was on his way to Minerva's office to discuss some of Hogwarts finances when he bumped into Lockhart. "Professor Dumbledore. I haven't seen you for a while." Albus made a none committed noise as he stopped outside Minerva's door  
"I have been busy you know how it is, school to run."  
"Indeed are you here to see Minnie?"  
Albus ignored the question and raised his hand to knock but stopped when he heard unfamiliar music coming from the other side and then there was Minerva's voice as she sang along.

_You walked into the party  
Like you were walking onto a yacht  
Your hat strategically dipped below one eye  
Your scarf it was apricot  
You had one eye in the mirror  
As you watched yourself gavotte  
And all the girls dreamed that they'd be your partner  
They'd be your partner, and  
_  
"Do you think that she is singing about me?" asked an excited Lockhart "have I finally gotten to her?"

_You're so vain  
You probably think this song is about you  
You're so vain  
I'll bet you think this song is about you  
Don't you? Don't you?  
_  
"Yep" grinned Albus "I would say that it's about you. Seems you really got to her" with that he quietly opened the door and saw Minerva at her desk singing away unaware of her audience.

_You had me several years ago  
When I was still quite naive  
Well, you said that we made such a pretty pair  
And that you would never leave  
But you gave away the things you loved  
And one of them was me  
I had some dreams they were clouds in my coffee  
Clouds in my coffee, and _

You're so vain  
You probably think this song is about you  
You're so vain  
I'll bet you think this song is about you  
Don't you? Don't you?  
  
"This can't be about me I'm not vain" protested Lockhart quietly. 

_I had some dreams they were clouds in my coffee  
Clouds in my coffee, and _

You're so vain  
You probably think this song is about you  
You're so vain  
I'll bet you think this song is about you  
Don't you? Don't you?

Well, I hear you went up to Saratoga  
And your horse naturally won  
Then you flew your Lear jet up to Nova Scotia  
To see the total eclipse of the sun  
Well, you're where you should be all the time  
And when you're not, you're with  
Some underworld spy or the wife of a close friend  
Wife of a close friend, and

You're so vain  
You probably think this song is about you  
You're so vain  
I'll bet you think this song is about you  
Don't you? Don't you? Don't you?

You're so vain  
You probably think this song is about you  
You're so vain  
You probably think this song is about you  
You're so vain  
You probably think this song is about you

You're so vain (so vain)  
I'll bet you think this song is about you  
Don't you? Don't you? Don't you?  
  
At the end of the song Lockhart went up to Minerva, whose head snapped up to look at the intruder and said "My Darling you have such a lovely singing voice. Why don't you sing a song about me and how brave and handsome I am."  
Albus just watched in amazement as Minerva suddenly snapped "I was singing about you. You are vain with an intelligence that is rivaled only by Pomona's gardening tools."  
Lockhart's eyes were as wide as plates at that "Minerva really you could hurt my feelings."  
"I don't care and besides I have a hard enough time trying to imagine you with a personality without being bothered by you feelings."  
"Minerva I don't think you want to be saying this to…."  
"No the problem with you is that you don't think. Why do people with closed minds always open their mouth and you just can't stop."  
"Miner…"  
"Don't say another word Lockhart you would just piss me off and I'm running out of places to hide the bodies." Lockhart's eyes grew even larger at that "Now GET OUT!" and for the first time in his life Lockhart took some good advise and practically ran from the room passed Albus who was near doubled up with laughter at the Lockhart bashing that he had just witnessed.  
"Yes Albus" asked Minerva calmly. Too calmly.  
"I need …" Albus broke off chuckling "I need you to sign these forms." he handed the forms over then collapsed into one of the chairs in front of the Minerva's desk.  
"Really Albus you must conduct yourself in a manner befitting a Headmaster of a prestigious school."  
"Just like you did?" he asked then burst out laughing. Minerva just rolled her eyes and signed the forms with a small grin on her face. 

MMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMAD"Gods.

Doesn't that man give up." Xiomara and the rest of the staff watched as Minerva ignored a still persistent Lockhart as yet again he tried to impress her enough to date him.  
"Didn't he learn after that incident in her office." asked Sal  
"Obviously not" came a voice from behind them as Albus stepped further into the room "do you think I should rescue her?"  
"I have a slight feeling Minerva would love you forever if you did that" said Xio then muttered under her breath "but you wouldn't have to do that to get her to love you she already does your just too blind to see that." Severus, Filius and Sal all snorted at that and turned to watch the show.  
"Gilderoy. I believe there are a couple of students at your office wanting help with their homework."  
"Ok then Professor I will be right there." Lockhart turned back to Minerva. "Think about what I said Minnie. You're not getting any younger and you are hardly beating off suitors with a stick. I'm the best chance you have. You're not my best chance but hay I'm willing to put my standards down for you."  
Minerva just looked at the blonde haired man as he stood up a look of hurt filled her eyes. But that look was soon replaced by a look of pure anger as she shot up and pointed her wand at him as a flash of pale yellow light erupted from the end. However that was not the only flash that hit Lockhart. A vivid orange also struck, the source of which turned out to be Albus.  
Albus calmly tucked his wand back into his pocket and looked at Lockhart with ice in his eyes. "Professor. You will produce a formal written apology to Minerva before the week is through. If you do not I will have no choice but to take disciplinary action for what you have said today. Also I would advise you to leave Minerva McGonagall alone unless you wish for a repeat performance of today. Do we understand each other?"  
Lockhart, whose face was covered with angry, oozing boils, just nodded. "Sdopwlmryv qieur ot baja." Lockhart said then looked around the room "Wrjjgg dlirwn wmf qoeg pcv vdneomfyut. YRNKSD SLCNVOIUT ENJDOFMZKX EUF JGFJ IFJFDDF DFJFGNG!"  
Albus just looked at Minerva who shrugged "I was sick of listening to him. He makes much more sense now."  
Lockhart pointed at Minerva and started to shout again "IAPWFNF SIFF LPAEI NCOSUR OSIRFS LAIRYT PWQSXZ XIPW ZALO QJE!"  
"Indeed." said Albus grinning "However I haven't a clue what you just said you need to go to the hospital wing. Off you go." With that Albus pushed Lockhart out the staff room door and shut it just in time to block out the laughter coming from the room.

MMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMAD

Minerva and Albus were sat staring at a chess board in Albus' office when Poppy's head poked out of the fire to report that though Lockhart would be fine it could take up to 24 hours before the boils went down and that she was going to keep the inability to talk till then just so that she would have an excuse not to talk to him while he was under her care.  
Albus nodded and looked at Minerva barely noticing when Poppy's head disappeared. _"She looks so depressed. Her eyes are dull with little life in them and her shoulders are slumped. I haven't seen her like this since her parents died."  
_"Minerva. What is the matter. What's wrong. Tell me, maybe I can help."  
Minerva just shook her head "I shouldn't have lost my temper."  
"Minerva anyone in that position would have done the same. Hell I did the same."  
"But he was right. I'm not getting any younger. I was never a beauty even in my youth and now that I'm getting on. I have never beaten them off with sticks as Lockhart put it. It seems to me that Lockhart was right I will grow older and more alone then ever."  
Albus' heart broke at that statement "Minerva You are the kindest, funniest, most intelligent woman I have ever met and you're wrong you are damn beautiful." Albus sighed and got up to stare out the large window.  
"Albus why did you get mad at him."  
"Because I wanted to be the one who asked you out, who filled your rooms with roses, but I was too much a coward too do it and when he said that stuff and that I saw that look of hurt and vulnerability on your face I just wanted to take you in my arms and kiss that hurt away. But I knew if I had done any of that then you would have hexed me or something."  
Minerva stood up and slowly moved towards Albus. She wanted to ask why he thought that she would hex him for doing those things when all she wanted was for him to kiss her and ask her out and romance her. Why would she stop him when she had been in love with him since she was 25 and started teaching at Hogwarts. But all that she managed to say was a croaked "Why?"  
Albus winced. This was the main reason people lied so much it was much easier then the truth. This was where he faced her rejection. "Why would I want to do those things because I love you. I always have and I always will." Albus was still staring out at the grounds as the sun set thus he didn't see as Minerva walked even closer and also didn't see the huge grin on her face.  
"I know you don't feel the same but I didn't want to lose you completely. I never meant for you to find out for if you didn't know then I could still be your friend and I would still have you in my life. Selfish I know but…" whatever else Albus was going to say was cut of when Minerva attached her lips to Albus'  
The kiss started soft and sweet but soon escalated with all the suppressed emotions coming out to leave them breathless. "I love you too Albus." Albus just looked at her slack-jawed then grinned and kissed her again. Albus broke it of to scoop Minerva into his arms and with her pressed firmly to his chest as he carried her into his rooms.  
"Aww come on ain't that just sweet. About bloody time." called Armando.  
"Hush Armando. Come on lets go tell the others what's happened"

MMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMADMMAD

The party was in full swing when the good news arrived in the staff room. They drank some more in celebration and cheered.  
"Hay who won the money?" asked Roland the muggle studies teacher.  
"Xiomara and Severus won 500 galleons each" answered a tipsy Filius from his position on the floor where he had fallen earlier. "Xio guessed boils and Severus guessed changing or silencing his annoying voice."  
"It would be you two. Lucky Sods" Muttered Zanzibar Kettleburn. "What are you going to do with the money?"  
"It's going towards our second honeymoon. It's our 5 year anniversary in august. 5 years it feels like a life time ago."  
Xio glared at her husband and said "I'd be careful if you want to survive till then." the sight of the ex-Death Eater and resident bastard of the dungeons nodding meekly and saying "Yes dear. Sorry dear" caused more laughter erupt around the room.

**The End**

**Well Not Quite The End**

The war had been over for a year and Harry had finally defeated Voldemort. Peace ruled again and Albus and Minerva were on holiday in Venice to celebrate their fifth anniversary.  
The couple were currently taking full advantage of the hotel's luxury facility's and were sat in a large bath filled with warm water and bubbles. They sat with Minerva's back nestled against Albus' chest.

"Albus I have something to tell you." said Minerva.  
"Umhuh." Albus murmured as he began to kiss the soft white skin of Minerva's neck.  
"Albus….erm…..Ohh….give up. You know I can't concentrate when you do that."  
Albus grinned he knew perfectly well the effects his actions had on _his_ Minerva.  
Suddenly Minerva got up out of the water and walked naked out of the room. Albus watched her go marveling that this gorgeous woman was his wife and that she loved him with all of her heart.  
"Albus if you come in here and let me tell you my news then I will let you do whatever you want to me." teased Minerva. Without farther ado Albus climbed out and with a wave of his hand the water vanished from the tub.  
Albus entered their bedroom to find a still naked Minerva drying her long ebony hair in a rather provocative way. Slowly she put the towel down and walked over to her husband and wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him slowly.  
In a soft voice she said "Albus. I'm pregnant."  
Albus just stared at her "Are you sure" when she nodded Albus grinned and lifted Minerva into the air swinging her around. "You're pregnant. We are going to have a baby. I'm going to be a Daddy."  
Albus lowered Minerva so that her feet were back on the lush carpeting "You're going to be a Mummy. Tabby this is the best news ever."  
"I know. I love you Albus Dumbledore."  
"I love you too Minerva Dumbledore."

**THE END**

**!!!!!!!!!! NO MORE !!!!!!!!!!**

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**Well that is it, the end of Ladies man. I hope you enjoyed reading it. Thank you for all your reviews they have been brilliant.**

**Keep a look out for me again**

**Weezle**


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